Why Guests Should Avoid Bringing Gifts Along To A Destination Wedding

Okay, so it's wedding season again (when is it not?), and you have to sort through all the invitations and decide which wedding you're attending versus not. You think, "Can I afford to go to Tahiti?" and then quickly decide that yes, you can. So, now what? Besides the cost and figuring out how to efficiently pack your suitcase, there are myriad considerations for how to prepare for a destination wedding, such as who to bring as a plus one and making sure that your passport is up to date.

There are dos and don'ts, too, such as making sure you're dressed appropriately and not drinking too much just because there may be an open bar. A really important "don't" is to avoid bringing a gift to the prospective bride and groom. In a 2024 study conducted by The Knot, guests who flew to a destination wedding spent an average of $1,680. That's reason enough not to include a gift on top of what could be a very expensive bill. What's more, it could be inconvenient for the couple. As many destination weddings take place in far-off places, large or unwieldy wedding gifts could prove challenging to bring back home. Also, the couple is likely already bringing a lot of wedding-related things with them and won't want to worry about packing even more.

In a survey of 165 weddings of U.S. couples featured by Brides, 22% occurred overseas, popular destinations including Mexico, Italy, and Jamaica, one of the 10 Caribbean islands perfect for a destination wedding. So, guests are already undertaking a huge endeavor to share in their loved ones' nuptials just by getting there. Couples understand this and adhere to the sentiment that "your presence is our present." Also, you can rid yourself of any uncomfortable feelings of showing up empty-handed, as couples may be saving money by having a destination wedding.

That being said, appreciation of your presence and potentially lower wedding costs doesn't mean that you shouldn't give a gift at all. Some couples still include a registry with their destination wedding invitations, or may suggest giving a digital or cash gift. This alleviates the burden on guests of having to pack extra items or even having to pay for an extra checked bag.

You can also have a gift sent to the couple's home address either before or after the wedding. Some romantic gift ideas for the home are scented candles and bath caddies with spa items to match. Sending a gift digitally or directly to their home is also a nice way of showing appreciation, and can make up for your absence if you aren't able to attend the wedding at all. If cost is an issue, consider getting in on a group gift. This could also increase the chances that a couple receives higher-priced items on their registry, or ease honeymoon costs by contributing to a honeymoon fund.

While you'll want to skip bringing large, popular registry items like casserole dishes and food processors, there are plenty of destination wedding gifts you can give without having to lift a finger, and that you don't actually "bring." Besides cash, you can give travel-related gift cards, such as Airbnb or airline credits. It's likely the couple likes to travel, given their trip-oriented ceremony.

Many couples also opt for an all-inclusive resort for their venue, so gifts in or near the hotel, such as private dinners, a day spa, or a local excursion, could match well with their stay. For those with a sentimental streak, consider custom presents like a handwritten letter or a photo book. Monogrammed packing cubes are another unique gift idea, and they could help the couple to pack for home or their honeymoon, rather than present a hindrance.

However you choose to show up to the wedding, do what feels right to you. You'll know what to give (or not) based on what the wedding dictates or other factors like your relationship with the couple. It's also important to read the invitation closely for any specific guidelines. But overall, you're there to participate in the festivities and witness a meaningful union, so arrive with the intention of spreading cheer and having a great time.