This Rude Behavior Drives Flight Attendants Up The Wall And Can Cause Embarrassing Amounts Of Attention

In May 2025, social media influencer Lucie Fink uploaded a video on TikTok claiming that they were "spiraling" after a humiliating incident on a plane. The on-screen caption explained that Fink, assuming the flight attendant had missed their seat during service, tried to tap them on the arm to get their attention but was loudly rebuked and told, "DO NOT touch the flight attendants." Fink added that while they probably shouldn't have touched them, they were left mortified when the incident gained the attention of other passengers. The video has since sparked a discussion across social media, with many flight attendants claiming that touching or poking them is one of many things flight attendants want passengers to stop doing.

Comments on Fink's videos were split. Some believed the flight attendant had been unnecessarily rude, while others thought Fink should have used the call button or their voice. One comment from a flight attendant sympathized with Fink but explained that the flight attendant may have reacted that way because Fink was "probably the last drop in a very overfilled glass." Another flight attendant, Leanna Coy, backed up this idea in their own TikTok video, saying, "I think what many people don't realize is how many people poke us."

For flight attendants who spend hours every day crammed into a plane, passengers touching them becomes an almost constant affair. Many flight attendants have also been touched inappropriately, according to a report by the Association of Flight Attendants-CWA, in which 18% of the surveyed flight attendants reported experiencing physical sexual harassment within the previous year. So passengers touching them — even innocently — may become triggering for flight attendants who've been poked and prodded and possibly groped on the regular.

Gently tapping a flight attendant on the arm or shoulder has been a fairly common way of getting their attention, especially on flights where you may be reluctant to disturb the other passengers by loudly calling for them. But while many flight attendants love parts of their job, being constantly touched seems to be a huge peeve for most of them. Instead of touching them as they pass by, here are a few things to try.

First, if you're experiencing a genuine emergency or you urgently need help with something, use the call button above your seat. Flight attendants have sometimes discouraged passengers from using the call button for non-emergencies, but they are generally okay with passengers using it during a quiet moment to ask for non-emergency help. Just avoid pressing the button too often or at inconvenient times, like during food or drink service and when the plane is taking off or landing.

If you are afraid of using the call button for minor issues, you can raise your hand or call out a quiet "Excuse me?" as the flight attendant passes by. Some flight attendants are okay with being gently tapped in appropriate places, like the shoulder. In a conversation with HuffPost, flight attendant Sam Ward said the best way to get his attention is to wait for him to finish his existing duties before asking for help. Remember that flight attendants may have more important duties at the moment than getting rid of your trash or giving you a drink. In general, be kind and respect that they may not be able to attend to you right now but will help you as soon as possible.